{"id":654,"date":"2011-01-01T08:00:46","date_gmt":"2011-01-01T00:00:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.jeffangiegoh.com\/?p=654"},"modified":"2022-04-07T09:25:40","modified_gmt":"2022-04-07T01:25:40","slug":"23-seven-steps-to-civility","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jeffangiegoh.com\/?p=654","title":{"rendered":"23. Seven Steps to Civility"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201cHow good and pleasant it is when the people of God live together in unit<\/strong>y<\/em><\/span>\u201d [Psalm 133:1<\/span>]<\/em><\/p>\n

Today is 1 January. It is a special day, a world peace day.<\/p>\n

As violence increases in the world, all the more do we need this day specially set aside to remind us all of how much violence there is everywhere we turn and how true it is that the use of violence begets more violence.<\/p>\n

In the Catholic liturgical calendar, this day is special for another reason. January 1 is the Solemnity of Mary, Mother of God<\/span> [Theotokos<\/em> in Greek]. On this day, we honour the Mother of Jesus, the Prince of Peace.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/span>Mary the Mother of God – the Theotokos, the God-bearer.<\/h5>\n

For peace-seekers, this is a perfect opportunity to make a resolution to try to do our best to work towards creating a better world during the coming year. The first setting to begin from is the family in which we live. From there, people fan out to different walks of life. Different people in different settings can find on this day a perfect occasion to create consciousness, to do various things and hold various events that will spread hope for our shared wish of a more peaceful, just and sustainable world.<\/span><\/p>\n

As Christians, we cannot but return to Jesus’ model of nonviolence in the face of violence, to His practice of love in the face of hatred. And so Martin Luther King would respond to meanness with these words:\u00a0 \u201cTo our most bitter opponents we say: \u2018Throw us in jail and we will still love you.\u00a0 Bomb our houses and we will still love you.\u00a0 Beat us and leave us half dead, and we will still love you \u2026 but be ye assured that we will wear you down with our love.\u201d\u00a0 King was practising what the early Christian martyrs taught:\u00a0 \u201cGrace dulls even the sharpest sword.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Politicians expose the absence of genuine peace when they pursue peace by force and coercion. So Stanley Hauerwas writes: “Christians are called to non-violence not because we believe nonviolence is a strategy to rid the world of war… but [rather] in a world of war, as faithful followers of Christ, we cannot imagine being anything other than nonviolent. And that will make the world possibly more violent, because the world does not want the order it calls ‘peace’ exposed as the violence it so often is.”<\/span><\/p>\n

In November 2001, the United Nations invited the world to observe every January 1 as One Day in Peace<\/em>. The idea is great: If we can live for one day in peace, then we can work together to make peace last, one day at a time.<\/span><\/p>\n

Our New Year can be celebrated with a purpose \u2013 to create consciousness for peace and sharing. A shared community meal, for example, can bring people together to talk about how they can help to create a better community, a better world. What can we each do to help create peace in our own specific contexts?<\/span><\/p>\n

We can begin from the beginning, that is, with a basic behaviour of civility<\/em>. We can be more human to each other, and behave less like mere animals.<\/span><\/p>\n

Two examples came to our attention recently.<\/span><\/p>\n

First, is an example from the context of political life. There has been a depressing increase in violence \u2013 both verbal and physical \u2013 in the political arena in many countries. We used to be shocked by the punch-ups we saw happening in the Italian parliament. Now, the Taiwanese law-makers steal the CNN headlines. They punch each other during parliamentary debates that are shown on national TV as regular meal time entertainment. Scuffles continue into the streets between supporters of different political parties.<\/span><\/p>\n

A picture captioned \u201cTaiwan parliament fight\u201d appeared in the Taiwanese press. It featured the ever so common scene of elected representatives of the people not just in verbal altercation but in actual physical fight, and lady representatives climbing tables to hit other representatives with whatever came to hand.\u00a0<\/span>Will these elected “ladies and gentlemen” learn to be more lady-like and more gentlemanly, agreeing to disagree more civilly?<\/span>A group of more than 130 former legislators in the United States, both Republicans and Democrats, on seeing that good behaviour has plummeted in Congress, released a letter sounding a warning and urging for civility. The letter said:<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNone of us shrank from partisan debates while in Congress or from the partisan contests getting there. During our time in Congress, partisans on the other side may have been our opponents on some bills and our adversaries on some issues. They were not, however, the enemy.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

It went on:<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCongress appears gripped by zero-sum game partisanship. The goal often seems to be more to devastate the other side (the enemy, no longer the honorable adversary) than to find common ground to solve problems, much less to have a spirited but civil debate<\/a> about how to do so.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

An overt hostility towards the other side was clearly increasing and was a disturbing trend. They pointed the finger at both parties for this breakdown. But they also recognized outside forces at work:<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThe divisive and mean-spirited way debate often occurs inside Congress is encouraged and repeated outside: on cable news shows, in blogs, and in rallies. Members who far exceed the bounds of normal and respectful discourse are not viewed with shame but are lionized, treated as celebrities, rewarded with cable television appearances, and enlisted as magnets for campaign fund-raisers.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

These former legislators did their country a great public service by sounding the alarm about the direction of public discourse \u2013 a point resonated by religious leaders in the US.<\/span><\/p>\n

At a different front, a diverse group of more than one hundred religious leaders signed their names and committed to a “Civility Covenant.\u201d To their credit, they joined hands in recognizing that too often they have reflected the political divisions of their culture rather than the unity we have in the body of Christ. They realized with regret that the blood of party-tribalism flowed deeper than the water of baptism. So they came together to urge all who claim the name of Christ to “put away from you all bitterness and wrath and anger and wrangling and slander, together with all malice, and be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you” (Ephesians 4:31-32).<\/span><\/p>\n

The group then made seven biblically based commitments that are virtually seven steps towards truth and civility today. These are seven commitments that Christians can usefully carry with them as a reminder for themselves and a challenge to others. The Civility Covenant states:<\/span><\/p>\n

1. We commit that our dialogue with each other will reflect the spirit of the scriptures, where our posture toward each other is to be “quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry<\/em>” (James 1:19).<\/span><\/p>\n

2. We believe that each of us, and our fellow human beings, are created in the image of God. The respect we owe to God should be reflected in the honor and respect we show to each other in our common humanity, particularly in how we speak to each other. “With the tongue we bless the Lord and [God], and with it we curse those who are made in the likeness of God … this ought not to be so<\/em>” (James 3:9-10).<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

3. We pledge that when we disagree, we will do so respectfully, without falsely impugning the other’s motives, attacking the other’s character, or questioning the other’s faith, and recognizing in humility that in our limited, human opinions, “we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror<\/em>” (1 Corinthians 13:12). We will therefore “be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love<\/em>” (Ephesians 4:2).<\/span><\/p>\n

4. We will ever be mindful of the language we use in expressing our disagreements, being neither arrogant nor boastful in our beliefs: “Before destruction one’s heart is haughty, but humility goes before honor<\/em>” (Proverbs 18:12).<\/span><\/p>\n

5. We recognize that we cannot function together as citizens of the same community, whether local or national, unless we are mindful of how we treat each other in pursuit of the common good, in the common life we share together. Each of us must therefore “put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body<\/em>” (Ephesians 4:25).<\/span><\/p>\n

6. We commit to pray for our political leaders — those with whom we may agree, as well as those with whom we may disagree. “I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made — for kings and all who are in high positions<\/em>” (1 Timothy 2:1-2).<\/span><\/p>\n

7. We believe that it is more difficult to hate others, even our adversaries and our enemies, when we are praying for them. We commit to pray for each other, those with whom we agree and those with whom we may disagree, so that together we may strive to be faithful witnesses to our Lord, who prayed “that they may be one<\/em>” (John 17:22).<\/span><\/p>\n

The second example is the world of discourse <\/span>and dialogue over the cyber space. The Sojourners God’s Politics Blog, for example, which runs an interactive blog, has a useful Comment Code of Conduct to prevent coarse civic discourse. It reads:<\/span><\/p>\n

I will express myself with civility, courtesy, and respect for every member of the Sojourners online community, especially toward those with whom I disagree\u2014even if I feel disrespected by them. (Romans 12:17-21<\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n

I will express my disagreements with other community members’ ideas without insulting, mocking, or slandering them personally. ( Matthew 5:22<\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n

I will not exaggerate others’ beliefs nor make unfounded prejudicial assumptions based on labels, categories, or stereotypes. I will always extend the benefit of the doubt. ( Ephesians 4:29<\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n

I will hold others accountable by clicking “report” on comments that violate these principles, based not on what<\/em> ideas are expressed but on how<\/em> they’re expressed. (2 Thessalonians 3:13-15<\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n

I understand that comments reported as abusive are reviewed by Sojourners staff and are subject to removal. Repeat offenders will be blocked from making further comments. ( Proverbs 18:7<\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n

As one strolls round the beautiful lakes in the city of Guilin, China, one reads many little signs placed unobtrusively along the footpaths in the pleasant lakeside landscape maintained by the city council. One of these signs reads: \u6587 \u660e \u7121 \u5c0f \u4e8b; \u5c0f \u4e8b \u898b \u6587 \u660e<\/strong> — in civilization nothing is trivial; in <\/em>trivia<\/em>s civility is disclosed. <\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Peace to all!<\/span><\/p>\n

Copyright \u00a9 Dr. Jeffrey & Angie Goh, January 2011. All rights reserved.<\/span><\/p>\n

You are most welcome to respond to this post. Email your comments to us at jeffangiegoh@gmail.com.<\/strong> You can also be dialogue partners in this Ephphatha Coffee-Corner Ministry<\/em> by sending us questions for discussion.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cHow good and pleasant it is when the people of God live together in unity\u201d [Psalm 133:1] Today is 1 January. It is a special day, a world peace day. As violence increases in the world, all the more do we need this day specially set aside to remind us all of how much violence Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"sfsi_plus_gutenberg_text_before_share":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_show_text_before_share":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_icon_type":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_icon_alignemt":"","sfsi_plus_gutenburg_max_per_row":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"rttpg_featured_image_url":null,"rttpg_author":{"display_name":"Dr. Jeffrey & Angie Goh","author_link":"https:\/\/www.jeffangiegoh.com\/?author=1"},"rttpg_comment":0,"rttpg_category":"From Our Perspective<\/a>","rttpg_excerpt":"\u201cHow good and pleasant it is when the people of God live together in unity\u201d [Psalm 133:1] Today is 1 January. It is a special day, a world peace day. As violence increases in the world, all the more do we need this day specially set aside to remind us all of how much violence…","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jeffangiegoh.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/654"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jeffangiegoh.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jeffangiegoh.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jeffangiegoh.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jeffangiegoh.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=654"}],"version-history":[{"count":17,"href":"https:\/\/www.jeffangiegoh.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/654\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7019,"href":"https:\/\/www.jeffangiegoh.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/654\/revisions\/7019"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jeffangiegoh.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=654"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jeffangiegoh.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=654"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jeffangiegoh.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=654"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}